When we’re afraid of the unknown, we look for data and facts and logical action steps to give us a sense of safety and security. If I do X, I should achieve Y.
When we embrace the unknown, we lean into the power of storytelling. I think it’s why so many of us who pursue a life outside of the norm have such active minds. We use them to connect the dots of our past experiences and build a vivid vision of our future.
But used incorrectly, our active minds begin overthinking how to find the perfect and most logical action plan.
So if you, too, have a rebellious energy and crave building a life outside of the cookie cutter norms, then look at where you’re spending your brain’s energy. Is it on connecting the dots of your life and creating meaning from your journey? Or is it on researching how to hit goals that you think you should be hitting by this age?
Every so often, it’s helpful to pause and take inventory of how far we’ve come. I’m due for this kind of check-up myself.
(Maybe that’s how we should think of it? Like an annual physical check-up, but an annual soul check-up. Reflect on our history, the pivotal choices that brought us here, and how we can continue refining what feels good for us.)
In marketing speak, this is called an Origin Story: the backstory for why any business was founded and why customers should buy into the vision.
Why aren’t we doing the same for ourselves?
Writing out our backstory. Gaining an understanding of why we’re living the life we have today. Buying into a vision for our future life.
Even when we try, here’s where most of us go wrong. (Especially us, the perfectionists.) We don’t know where to start or which stories to include. We default to a checklist of accomplishments that might look good on a resume, but actually just bore us. Went to university. Got a job. Hated job. Got a new job. Moved to a new country. Moved home.
The problem with the above is that it isn’t exciting. More than that, it doesn’t highlight the magic of what’s happening underneath all those experiences. Like that specific lesson you learned at your first job. Or that random hobby that introduced you to someone who was a key player in your life. Or the frustration you experienced in a situation that taught you what your boundaries and priorities are.
In my Personal Brand Framework, I dedicate the first month to helping my clients gain clarity on who they are at their core. I call it “turning on the tap of authenticity”. Drip by drip, the clarity starts to emerge.
And while there are many jumping off points to get started, today I wanted to share one of the tools I use: Human Design.
… because there’s nothing worse than staring at a blank page trying to figure out who you are and what you stand for.
Human Design gives you somewhere to start. It’s not about telling you who you are, it’s more of a mirror that shows you what you are (often) already doing.
Here’s a peek at my Human Design reading: “You are here to show us all that we can be wise and always have a huge, playful zest for life. Don’t ever compromise having it all, and in doing so you will lift everyone else up too.”
Ooooh ain’t that the truth. And can I share something? That playful “zest for life” side of me is one I’ve always been very protective over. Afraid that the world will try to rip it away from me.
You’re too happy? It’s toxic positivity.
You love your life too much? Must be faking it.
You’re optimistic about the world? You’re out of touch with reality.
We’re all pursuing a well-rounded life of “having it all”. But when someone actually achieves it?
They’re a selfish asshole.
In our current society, the trend is this: the happier you get, the quieter you become. You retreat. And I get it. There comes a point where you have to choose where you’ll invest your energy: in living your dream life or in defending it.
But just because “that’s the way things are” isn’t reason enough for it to continue being that way.
Retreating from mainstream society because you’re happy and successful is so backwards to me. I get it. But it’s backwards.
Why isn’t it mainstream to have a zest for life?!
It’s a question I want to spend my whole life answering.
As I look back on my life, it’s a question I’ve been working on answering my whole life.
Why was I born into the final years of a 50+ year communist regime imposed over Lithuania? What did coming into the world at that pivotal time imprint on me when it comes to believing and fighting for your freedom and sovereignty?
Why did I live a double life of summers in Europe and school years in Canada? What did juggling two cultures and two ways of life imprint on me when it comes to seeing the dogma around me?
Why was my first job out of university at a financial firm? What did working in finance right after the 2008 financial crash imprint on me when it comes to how people outsource their money and power to “higher” (but not wiser) powers?
Why did I move to Kuala Lumpur to work at Mindvalley? What did living in this bubble of personal development imprint on me when it comes to developing a belief in the unlimited abundance of our world?
Why did 2020 happen in my lifetime? What did living through a social upheaval imprint on me when it comes to having self-agency over our emotional well-being?
Why did I launch this Friday Newsletter? What has using my voice online imprinted on me when it comes to the power of self-expression?
When I ask myself these questions I feel secure in my journey.
I embrace the unknown because I’m so fired up about these questions. How could I ever desire a logical cookie-cutter “next step” for my career when I’m driven by this crazy AF change that I want to see and create in the world?!
That’s the power of storytelling.
Needless to say, I just opened my Instagram to this meme: “Sorry I’m late, I woke up disenchanted with the human experience.”
Looks like we have our work cut out for us!
Now, tell me. What moments in your life make you curious? What have they imprinted on you? How might they be part of your life story?