My new favourite way to set goals is to choose quick n’ dirty monthly goals.
While the big lifelong dreams and three year goals are the ones pinned to my vision board—giving me guidance on the direction I want my life to move in—they’re not where my sense of achievement lies. They’re the slow burn goals, or rather, the directional goals. Goals that help me make day-to-day decisions on which clients to work with or which projects to take on or where to invest my money or what to prioritize this week.
But alongside those directional goals, it’s important to also have the quick n’ dirty goals that boost your inner confidence.
That get your inner dialogue going with: Oh yes bish, you ARE killing it.
These quick wins are what fuel our momentum to keep pushing towards the bigger goals (that are harder to stay motivated for with their month-long, or even year-long, stints of not showing tangible results). They’re the gold stickers we secretly crave.
I’ve been able to hit my goal for June (health related), for July (business related), for August (growth related), and now I’m onto my September goal: to stop working at 6pm every day.
It always starts so innocently… a few extra minutes one day, then an “I’ll just get a head start on tomorrow” another day, and all of sudden? It’s 10pm, you have anxiety in your chest, you start overthinking your intelligence, and you’re staring at the ceiling instead of drifting off into blissful sleep.
For me, this cycle is all too familiar. The urge to prove my worth suddenly flares up and I want to show up as the smartest/best/hardest working person EVER (a very, very subjective desire that is based on people-pleasing and a fear of unworthiness). So then, I throw myself into my work (letting those extra minutes and hours get added to my workload each night). The only logical next step becomes declining non-work related activities to stay on top of it all (last week I actually skipped watching RHOBH because I wanted to finish a project for a client at 9pm—say what?!) and soon, the momentum of life takes on a direction of its own: my career becoming the only priority in my life, my entire worth becoming tied to how happy my clients are, becoming extra sensitive to any setbacks or roadblocks, and throwing even more of my time into my career
Ultimately, I start to lose the ease and joy in my life.
And what’s the point of life if you’re not basking in the summer sun like the proud bish that you are while inhaling the fresh smells of nature and delightful sounds of the birds?!
So when I say I’m stopping work at 6pm every night, it’s not for arbitrary reasons. It’s because I want to preserve my rich, vibrant, and joyful life before it takes a plunge into a robotic, linear, and anxious life.
We all have to catch ourselves sometimes.
Even the most woke of us.
(And I consider myself quite the woke lady, as a matter of fact!)
We assume there’s a “right way” to live and so we forget that our routines and energy levels are meant to be cycled through. That, actually, a “perfect routine” just freezes us into one energetic state, leading our inner magic to start bursting at the seams.
What starts out as passion quickly spins out into burnout.
What starts out as rest quickly spins out into lethargy.
What starts out as excitement quickly spins out into overwhelm.
Some of my favourite conversations each week are with my coaching clients.
It’s those philosophical chats of “what’s stopping you from moving towards your goals?” that get me jazzed.
And this week, one of our conversations was about these energy cycles.
How staying in an energy of rest for too long can lead us into a lethargic rhythm in our lives. How we need to get excited again to move past it, but when we stay in excitement for too long we can find ourselves overwhelmed with too many ideas, too many ambitious, too much everything.
It’s a cycle for a reason. We are not meant to stay in one type of energy forever. It’s why hustle is important, but too much hustle becomes dangerous.
I’m in the passion phase right now for my career—wanting to hit every goal and reach for all of my ambitious dreams!!!!!—but my hustle energy is starting to show signs of burnout, so it’s time to cycle my energy into rest.
Remembering that I am more than my career.
Spending more time outdoors.
Dreaming of my ideal lifestyle and injecting more of that into each day.
Planning new and exciting weekend activities.
Basically, getting out of that ra-ra-boss-babe-I-can-take-over-the-world energy long enough to actually live and enjoy the beauty of the world that already exists around me.
Which energy phase are you in right now?
Which new energy phase might you be needing to cycle into?
Let me know—I’m happy to share some pointers on where that might be for you.
And now, as I hit send on this newsletter, I’ll be heading out for a lunchtime walk with an oat latte that I plan to pick up from a coffee shop nearby. When I return, I want to start reading the new fiction book I picked up a few days ago. Then, my sister is bringing over her two puppies (they’re 10 weeks old already!) and we’re going on a playdate at the park.
And the forecast for the rest of the weekend?
Brunch, vineyards, and a farmer’s market.
I hope your week is filled with more passion than burnout, more rest than lethargy, and more excitement than overwhelm.
And if it’s not, just hit reply. I would love to help you move out of that stuck state and into a more confident way of living.
Because why the hell not after these past 18 months?!
Personally, I’m done with the outside world dictating my energy, my happiness, my goals, and what I think or talk about.
I’m reclaiming my career. I’m reclaiming my rest. I’m reclaiming my life.
And most importantly? I’m reclaiming the joyful, vibrant woman I am in a world that doesn’t want to see that.
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